Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
