is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
