Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize