So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
