how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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