either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Randomize
