There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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