But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
