its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
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