You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
