he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
