ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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