Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
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