I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
