I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
