haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
