Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Betty ford says i'm here all night
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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