Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
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