I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
