he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
How does one acquire holy water?
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Randomize
