What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Randomize