why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
