Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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