I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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