brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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