I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
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