Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
