I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
