I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
