tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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