I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
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