It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
