yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
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