Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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