I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
