Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
