I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
There r osticjed everywhere
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Randomize