Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Success! We fucked roommates!
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
