My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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