Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Actions speak louder than pants.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
He shit in the fireplace
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
