I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Randomize
