Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize