was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
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