just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Randomize
