walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
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