god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize