Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
When are your genitals available?
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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