hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
