No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
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