Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
